Last night, I learned that the 2013 Gordon Cressy Leadership Awards had finally been announced, with the list of recipients put up online. I nominated some people, my girlfriend included, and I was asked to be nominated by one of my friends who has since graduated. In what must certainly be some sort of karma that is being exercised upon me, several of my close friends who were nominated won, and I did not.
I always find these kinds of things annoying, mainly because sure, I'm a little arrogant, and I believe that I deserve it. It just always makes me even more upset when I see people who win who, in my honest opinion, deserve them just as much as I do, or in some cases, far less than I do. Perhaps people think this about me, with my own awards, and perhaps I should "just be happy" with what I have, and maybe that's true. But when people win these things, and they have put in literally half the work I have put in, over my undergrad, I feel slighted and wronged. Are they saying that I am less of a "leader" (whatever that means) than these other people, because U of T did not see fit to grant me an award, but over a hundred people got one instead? Are they saying my work is less important than some of these other people (despite the fact that I have done the *exact* jobs that some of these other winners have done, and MORE on top, to boot)? Are they saying that my 40+ hour work weeks for the past year simply don't mean anything? Apparently, the answers to those questions are all "yes".
So, thanks, U of T, for making me feel insignificant, unimportant, and crappy one last time before my undergraduate is completed. It's not enough that at Convocation, you're treated like a second-class citizen if you don't have high distinction (or even distinction at all). It's not enough that the Departments here (such as the Department of English, which has perhaps the worst undergraduate counselor in the history of this university) are so unhelpful that they seem to actively ignore or block you from doing what is required to graduate. It's not enough that the Dean's Office only have administrative interests at heart. It's not enough that my own college engenders elitism and snobbery by creating a program for first years that deliberately provides them with more resources and activities than other people. Nope, all of those things were not enough, so you had to go and take an award away from me that I deserved. On top of that, you gave it to (some; the person *I* nominated, as uppity as that sounds, definitely deserved it) people who were less deserving, people who had done less than I.
Thanks, U of T. I have never been so ready to graduate, and to never come back here for education for the rest of my life.
P.S. If I ever become rich enough to donate money, U of T, this is the last place on Earth that money will ever go. Just so you know.
So, thanks, U of T, for making me feel insignificant, unimportant, and crappy one last time before my undergraduate is completed. It's not enough that at Convocation, you're treated like a second-class citizen if you don't have high distinction (or even distinction at all). It's not enough that the Departments here (such as the Department of English, which has perhaps the worst undergraduate counselor in the history of this university) are so unhelpful that they seem to actively ignore or block you from doing what is required to graduate. It's not enough that the Dean's Office only have administrative interests at heart. It's not enough that my own college engenders elitism and snobbery by creating a program for first years that deliberately provides them with more resources and activities than other people. Nope, all of those things were not enough, so you had to go and take an award away from me that I deserved. On top of that, you gave it to (some; the person *I* nominated, as uppity as that sounds, definitely deserved it) people who were less deserving, people who had done less than I.
Thanks, U of T. I have never been so ready to graduate, and to never come back here for education for the rest of my life.
P.S. If I ever become rich enough to donate money, U of T, this is the last place on Earth that money will ever go. Just so you know.
No comments:
Post a Comment